Friday, January 7, 2011

And he still wins my heart...



Today is our



5th Wedding Anniversary!


Six years ago I had a terrible of case of what I called: U.B.A.G. -
Uncontrollably.
Bitter.
About.
Guys.

Yes, I would seriously go around telling friends and yes, even guys that I was diagnosed with it, and they'd ask what it was, I'd ask them to guess what each letter stood for. I would laugh when they'd try to guess. Then lo and behold, the phrase that I thought was hogwash, came true... "love comes when you aren't looking."

As Beatrice's words were becoming my motto,"Not till God make men of some other metal than earth"...the heavens opened and led me to my Taylor. He was the cure to my loathsome dreary state. The whole unexpected package of love. (I know that was corny, but it's true, and I'm still the same hopeless romantic.)

I still can't believe how dating and courtship are these days. Seriously! What the heck is with dating these days!?! All guys want to do is "hang" out in groups. There's no more old fashioned wooing the girl and winning her heart, or giving her a sentiment, a token of his love, like a glove or a handkerchief. Nope. I remember accommodating for some guys and meeting up somewhere, since they thought I lived too far out. Or guys that wanted to ask me out, but never had the guts. And I had to seek them out. ~Sigh~ such Lame-O's. What's a girl to do these days with so few men with the guts to seek out love? It makes me think of the lyrics from "Too Many Miracles," from my favorite artist Badly Drawn Boy, "The age of romance is dead and gone, maybe a chance I'm wrong." (Guys, it's time to revert back to the old times. Even if you don't write poetry, just do something passionate to win the girls heart for cryin' out loud. Get over your fears of commitment and just put some faith in love.)

Taylor won my heart in every way. I still laugh at the fact that I was a city girl and he was a farm boy. I was this loud, hyper, silly, social butterfly. And he was this simple, quiet, mellow, down-to-earth guy. But we just worked. Instantly. He's exactly what I needed and I was exactly what he needed. It's so funny how the Lord works, isn't it?

The first 2 1/2 years as newlyweds were very hard for me and it wasn't easy for him either. Right after we got married, he was gone working out of town/state for long periods of time. He drove a fuel truck and went wherever the helicopters went (doing control burns and other assignments to do maintenance on them). Literally the words to the song, "Far Away," by Nickleback, were seriously the story of my life (talk about perfect timing when the song came out..crazy timing!). Having a long distant marriage...sucked. I clung to the gospel of Jesus Christ to help me get through and Taylor did many sweet things to try to make up for my many thousands of bottles of tears. I had to repeat in my mind constantly, you have to tough out hard times to get to something better. And we have. Because of my husbands' diligence and relentless ability to work hard, he gave me the greatest blessing, which is to be able to stay home and raise our daughter. I'm so grateful for his insight on so many things I couldn't see. He teaches me patience and diligence everyday. I just knew he was the one, when I realized that I fell in love with his character first and then his personality. I knew when it came down to it, it didn't matter how much we had in common. But if our dreams were in common. We've gotten through so much together. And we've reached many of our dreams; Taylor has a career that he's talented at doing and enjoys, we were blessed to start a family and I've been blessed to be home raising our daughter. And I know because of my faith and because of his the Lord has blessed us to have these dreams a reality.

What I've learned so far in the 5 years of my marriage:
  • You can't change your husband. You can't force him to do things or be a certain way. He has his own timing. Which means what I want may or may not happen. (chuckle under breath)
  • He has his own way of complimenting me (other than words). I love when he spanks me when I walk past him or while I'm cooking, when he tickles me (even when I say stop), our inside jokes, and just the way he looks at me and holds me. And he always tells me he loves me! :)

  • We'll always be on different levels as far as spiritual and non-spiritual terms. But that's what marriage is about. Constantly learning and helping each other grow in every area.

  • Never talk about what's on your mind right before bed. Like most women, I wait till the end of the day, to go off about my concerns or feelings or needs... Well, as much I didn't want to accept it, their brain shuts off by that time, and then us women get all upset and emotional because we don't think they listen or seem to care. But really, it's because they're too tired to even listen or remember the conversation! (haha!)

  • Don't talk about more than one issue. Their brains can't handle or ponder more than one issue. When I rambled off on my numerous random topics, I would get annoyed when I would finish talking, and he'd just sit silent, and I'd ask why he isn't saying anything in response. Then get mad and sad. Then I realized it's because it's information overload for men. So I'm determined to only bring up one concern/issue. (Now I just need to figure out what time of day to do it, since guys get tired fast when they're not pre-occupied doing something! hah!)

  • My love for him has grown so much. I'm in love with so many more things about him. I can find a million things to fall in love with over and over again.


I always tell Taylor that everyone loves him, and he laughs and denies it. But really, once you talk to Taylor, what's not to like? (or love about him?) My family has said so many times how they love the way Taylor says things. It's so simple and funny. He just says it as it is. He doesn't go off on tangents, he just gets to the point. Whereas, I'm opposite, when I talk I expound, dig deep and go off on tangents at times! ;) hee hee! (lots of women do!). I love that his hobbies open a whole new world to me, such as hunting. Though I don't know if I'll ever have the guts to shoot an animal, it is interesting when he talks about it and he sure looks hot in that camo! His love for anything with engines and ability to fix things is just awesome. The fact that he was one of those people that ditched school, but would still pass his tests, STILL makes me sick! (I hardly missed school!) And the way he can do math so quickly in his head astounds me! (he knows he's helping the kids with math homework, that's for sure!)

There's a test I took about marriages and it was interesting since all the questions are things I've thought about as to why our marriage works. We both took it and scored high :) Here's the quiz: Sustainable Marriage Quiz (and the article.)

I love Taylor and all that he does to make me happy. I will always admire him for all that he had to overcome and for who he has become. I'm so grateful to be his wife, and know I'm sealed to him and our daughter for eternity, I thank the Lord for that. I know that as we both focus on Christ and better each other, we will sustain a peaceful and strong marriage. I love my family more than anything. And I hope that others will have faith in their love and marriage. Because marriage is important. It's not just a piece of paper. It's a promise of loyalty and trust which proves that with hard undaunting work and faith in each other...




{{love conquers all}}

3 comments:

Janna Murphy said...

I really enjoyed reading your thoughts and seeing the darling pictures--have a wonderful anniversary!!

Four Bresees said...

Congrats guys! :)

Natalie said...

You are so awesome! I loved this post! And when you posted a comment on my goofy public blog a few months ago, my heart lept! I've missed you so much! I need your email addy so I can invite you to read my privte blog. Here's my email - drop me a line when you get a chance: nhmatkin(at)msn(dot)com. ;)